A journey to self

This is a piece that came through to me a few years ago while in flow and not thinking what I was writing. It comes from a deeply connected place. In fact, I hadn’t re-read it since I wrote it and put it away in a notebook, hidden in the back of a drawer until I found it this week. It feels the right time to share. It may or may not resonate with you. I’ve typed it as accurately as I can from its raw, written form.

When do we learn to care more for the needs of others, than to care for our own needs?

When do we learn the word selfish, and why are we not taught the words self-love or self-care?

When do we switch off the signal that allows us to receive?

Is that when we learn?

When we allow our inner voice to be dulled, drowned out by the voices of all those who see our light, and choose to dim it so that they can feel ‘more’?

More what? More equal? More than?

When we allow our inner voice, our internal guidance to the best of us, our best life, to be dimmed, we become a paler version of ourselves.

It may make it easier for you to fit in, at least for some period of time, to feel like you belong, but if you are not allowing yourself to hear your own voice, your truth then you are not being your best self.

Does it matter? Well, does it?

Only you can know if it matters to you. If you feel comfortable in your own skin. Not defined by the external approbation of others, whose voices drown out your own. Sometimes they are hearing you, sometimes they are not. Sometimes, after a while they are quietly stifling you, quietly making you doubt. 

Doubt whether you are right when they criticise but mean well. Just for your benefit, you understand. To help you get perspective.

To see it from their point of view. Y’know. Outside of you. Not actually seeing you. But seeing the version of you that exists, like a hologram, as a projection of what everyone else needs to you be.

Then do you hear your inner voice? Quietly, it whispers to you. Is that true? Is that you? Are you what ‘they’ say? You listen to them and the projection expands, layer upon layer.

Until one day, the inner voice, that once quiet voice shouts loudly enough…

‘Hello, this is me. You, your truth here.’ 

That’s when it begins.

The quiet knowing. The quiet hearing. The quiet voice that you now listen to. Just now and then.

This. This is the beginning.

The beginning of your journey.

The journey back to yourself.

To your beauty, your magnificence, your completeness, your whole, your truth.

You, in all that you are and ever were.

Back home to your heart. Your love. Your love of self.

Herein lies all wisdom, peace and joy.

You.

Go shine your light.

Connecting, in love.

I hope you are travelling well and positively through these changing times. 

It feels important that we stay in our knowing and in our power – our light – so we can guide ourselves, and take personal responsibility for our journeying.

I am so grateful for the opportunity to connect with you all remotely during this time of isolation and have already done that with so many of you in the 20 meditations and gong baths I have already delivered during lockdown. Amazing to have counted them all today!

I know that so many of you have found them helpful too, and I’ve enjoyed getting such encouraging feedback.

 ‘Thank god for your online meditation sessions!’

 ‘I thoroughly enjoy the meditation sessions and appreciate you taking time to run them. I’m so grateful’

 ‘Always leave the sessions feeling lush.’

‘That was wonderful, thank you. So glad I could join in.’

‘We really enjoyed it, thanks so much. We slept like logs!’

To preserve the integrity and quality of the work, I have now been guided that there should be some value exchange for all sessions I do.

This means that from today, the twice weekly meditation sessions that I’d previously offered for free will now be by minimum donation. I am very keen to continue to support everyone who is in need and fully appreciate that everyone’s circumstances are different. If you can genuinely only afford £1 per session, I’ll receive that with appreciation and gratitude.

If your circumstances offer you the opportunity to pay more, then be guided by your own sense of the value to you.

Gong and sound bath sessions remain on a sliding scale of £5 to £15 person, whatever best suits your personal situation right now.

All one-to-one sessions remain the same as advertised here http://www.helsnicholas.co.uk/what-we-do.  I may be able to make concessions, so if you are in need of support and are currently unable to afford the exchange, please get in touch so we can discuss.

As ever, I remain committed to offering what support I can to help you feel safe, whole and well. Please remember to be kind, gentle and patient with yourself.

Beaming love your way, as ever

Health and Safety. Act.

Twenty-four years ago, to the week, I walked out of my home and never went back. I had no plan, packed nothing, didn’t even know where I was going when I got into the car and drove.

I left my husband behind, despite protestations and declarations of love. Something in me knew that I had to get out and get out then. 

That something was my sense of survival, it over-rode all the other logic and senses. I am certain to this day it literally saved my life.

We have all heard about the terrifying increase of domestic violence since we are in lockdown. Horrific for those locked inside four walls with someone who will manipulate and twist that situation to create even more carnage, wreaking their own inadequacy and lack of control onto others.

I was one of the lucky ones, I got out and stayed out. I had a family that supported me. I got away from the physicality of the challenge, and yet also carried it with me. Within me.

All those echoes inside that are the inevitable fertile breeding ground for self-doubt. The rich pastures of every voice that told you that you are not enough. Not good enough, not clever enough, not creative enough, not slim enough, not sporty enough, not pretty enough, not strong enough. 

Or that you are too much. Too sensitive, too dramatic, too close, too emotional. 

Not just the words of those, but the behaviours that proved it to you.

Those are the seeds sought out by the manipulators, season after season. Sewing even more doubt, feeding even greater insecurity.

I trust that your lockdown situation is one in which you are safe from any harm which others may wreak upon you. If it is not, I truly hope that when it is the right time for you, that you find your own route out, as I did.

If you are reading this and thinking that you are glad not to be in lockdown with someone who is unkind or even destructive, I want to offer you a new perspective perhaps. 

What if you are in lockdown with your own worst enemy? You! 

How many of us have ever said that about themselves? I certainly have in the past.

You see, the inner critic is the one that needs to be gotten away from to keep you in the healthiest and safest place of all.

How many times have you found yourself being angry, impatient, unkind or downright rude to and about yourself? In a way that you would never speak to a friend, or a younger loved one. 

How many times have you been judgemental about yourself? Inside your head or even shouting at yourself to stop being lazy, get up, get out, get baking, get making, get writing, get online, get cleaning, get going, get exercising, get rid of the chocolate … (don’t do that!).

No but seriously, don’t DO that. To yourself.

Instead, try this. When you hear that voice inside yourself that you think is you, being unkind or impatient, just stop. Stop whatever it is you are doing and count to 10. Ask yourself this question …

Is that really me? Is that my voice telling me those awful things? Where did that come from?

You certainly weren’t born believing you are stupid, ugly, incapable. So it came from somewhere.

I would lay odds on that it wasn’t you at all, it was someone else. So someone else told you, or simply made you feel that way with their words and their behaviours. But it was a long time ago and slipped out of your conscious memory, because it was painful, shocking even. But it stayed with you.

So that inner voice, the harshest inner critic. It’s not even you! Not originally. All those voices have morphed into one and become yours.

So. Here’s an invitation to you.

Whilst you are in lockdown, whilst you have none of the normal everyday busyness of everyday business to distract you, gift yourself permission to become more aware.

Become aware of those things about yourself that you feel less than good about or comfortable with.

How many of those can you identify? Don’t get competitive or greedy about it, we’ve all got some!

But do try and dig a bit deeper, try and go back before you assumed ownership of the voice. See if you can find out who it came from. What memories come up? You can be sure they won’t be comfortable, they may well be very painful. However, in bringing them out of the shadows and into the light of consciousness you then have a choice.

Do I still choose to believe this story about myself? Or can I decide I can put it down and leave it there, walk onwards without it. Like an unwanted Christmas gift, you’ve held on to it, but you can now decide you don’t want it cluttering your space. Take it to the recycling centre … leave it there. 

Dig deep, dig deep beneath all those old hurts and wounds. You have no idea what buried treasure lies beneath. It’s you, the true you. Magnificent you. Go get’ em. 

And don’t forget I am here, journeying through and along with you. If you need some healing help, you know where to find me.

First stages, first steps

How to begin to talk about grief? 

No need to panic. We should, of course, all be opening our hearts and sending love out to all those who are faced with the reality of death during this COVID-19 outbreak. No-one in the world will be able to escape some kind of impact, but that’s not what I want to talk about here, now.

But I do want to talk about grieving for a loss of life.

Let me start with some context when the life I was living 26 years ago, 200 miles away, was unrecognisably different. A friend had recently lost her sister and while I was unable to appreciate fully what she was going through, she seemed to take comfort from my support. On her recommendation, I found myself volunteering as a bereavement support worker for the hospice that had cared for her sister.

Training was intense, on top of the unsocial hours and shift work in my ‘day job’. But I got through it and was allowed to support those recently bereaved.

Although quarter of a century ago, something of that training has particularly stayed in mind and periodically finds a new relevance.

It came to me first when I faced my divorce. My training had helped me realise that my marriage was simply not one I could healthily stay in. I headed to London, where life began again. And then love began again with a wonderful, unexpected new soul love. It was complicated, but our connection was so powerful we persevered in finding ways to make things work. And then he was killed in an accident and the world we’d been creating fell apart. 

The grief journeyed directly to my door. Broke in and broke me. 

I was quite some time in that wilderness, but 20 years later life is once more unrecognisable. A new and even richer soul love makes my world all the warmer. A community of kind, creative, wonderful people I call friends. And work – my purpose work as a healer and medium, helping and supporting people to be their best self – really taking off. It was joyful and fulfilling. 

Until a few short weeks ago. Once again, grief came to the door. 

No-one that I know had died, but what I remember so vividly from training is that grief is an inevitable and wholly understandable response to the loss of things we value. I recall the tears as a treasured possession was taken from me during one exercise – the pen my friend had gifted me in thanks for my support. I feel those tears as I write. I remember the profound wrench that accompanied my taking of someone’s late father’s watch. These may have appeared simple objects, but it was a powerful demonstration of grieving and loss.

Right now in this pandemic outbreak, to some greater or lesser degree, we are all experiencing grief. Grief is response to a loss. Although we’re all sharing the loss, it’ll be a unique, completely individual experience. How we journey through grief in our own way and our own time was another powerful take-out from training. Just as when a loved one dies, everyone that has loved and lost that person will have had their own relationship with them that will be reflected in their distinctive journey through grief. 

Our grief is for the loss of the life we had been living until a few short weeks ago. For the livelihoods we had worked hard to be creating. For the hopes and dreams we’d been investing in. For the loss of health, for the loss of the connection to loved ones, for the loss of liberty, unable to go out and do what we want, when we want. The loss of plans, events, gatherings. 

The loss of life as we knew it. And for which we grieve.

The first stage of grief is denial. If you look around, you will certainly see and have seen people who have seemed unwilling to grasp the reality of this situation. Perhaps consider that they are in the first stage of grief, denial. That might help us all be less judgemental and a little more compassionate and kind.

And because each of us had our own unique set of circumstances, hopes, dreams, aspirations, connections, your grief will be your own. 

Take your journey at your pace and do not expect more of yourself than you are ready for. Be kind. Be gentle. Be loving. Begin with yourself. It enables you to give from your heart, without running your own battery dry. Once you know how to be loving and kind to yourself, you will be able to pour that out of you and see it have an impact on those around you. And you will be able to do that consistently, connected to a loving self. Compassion and connection to self and for self is not self-ish!

While we need to respect the individuality of our differing journeys, we should equally be looking out for and supporting each other through what we are sharing – fast-changing and uncertain times. 

Some will be more equipped to embrace the change, while others will struggle to move out of the darkness in which they find themselves. While we can’t take someone else’s place on their journey, we can walk alongside them, sometimes unseen, sometimes more obviously and communally. Let’s stay in the kindness and steer clear of expectation and judgement. It’s heartening to see all the wonderful community efforts doing just that.

As we journey through our own and collective grief, let’s work with gentleness, kindness and love in our own unique way. Not just away from this challenge we all face, but more quickly and easily towards something hopeful and new. 

Love you. 

Inspiration, hope and calm.

So it feels like that is the complete opposite of what’s happening in our world right now, on a local, regional, national and global level. There is fear, anxiety, panic and despair. I get it. People are dying, people are afraid for their health, for that of their loved ones, and now even for their livelihoods.

I have veered away from posting anything because there are so many people in fear and despair. I hit a wobble myself at the weekend. I have parents over 70, both with underlying health conditions and I am 200 miles away from them. How can I support them both to be safe?

I recognised it and worked through it, giving myself space and permission to look at the feeling and then to let go of it. Fear serves only to disrupt the natural flow of your being. Your wellbeing will be impacted on all levels by fear which manifests in lots of ways but often as anxiety, anger and despair. It will suppress your immune system and it will cause you to shrink into a smaller version of yourself.

If you are in that place, it’s ok. Really. It is ok to not be ok. But don’t chose to stay stuck there. There are amazing things happening in your neighbourhood. You can focus on the panic buying, or you can focus on the community rallying around and setting up systems to support the most vulnerable. It’s your choice.

You can despair at how we will economically survive this, or we can see what a breath of life our planet is being given, when so many of us have wondered how she could keep on living herself. Look at the huge drop in air pollution, the blue skies appearing through the smog.

Keep yourself in your fullest version of you. Allow creativity to spurt forth where it has been swamped by being so busy doing. And doing and doing. Now is a time for us to remember that we are human BEINGS, not human doings.

My work is to help and support you to stay in your fullest self. Yes, that sometimes manifests as a bad back, or a low mood, or uncertainty in decision making. It manifests as tears, fear, anger, despair and a multitude of other shadow emotions. But you don’t have to get stuck there. I know, I have worked very hard at moving myself beyond some pretty dark places. I don’t dwell there any more, but I recognise them.

It is my intention today, to still do as much as I can to keep doing my work, in supporting you. I am looking at creative ways to do this, for those that simply do not feel able to come in person. More on that to come in the near future.

For now I leave you with this from a chance conversation with a loved one who offered up this and that’s what compelled me to write. Thank you Jack.

Shared in a closing down theatre show. Words by Gurpreet Gill.

For me, they so beautifully and eloquently say what I feel in my heart, but couldn’t ever have written with such grace and beauty. I hope they touch you with inspiration, hope and calm.

There is so much fear about COVID-19.

And, what if …

If we subscribe to the philosophy that life is always working out for us, that there is an intelligence far greater than humans at work …

That all is interconnected.
What if …

The virus is here to help us?
To reset.
To remember.

What is truly important.

Reconnecting with family and community.

Reducing travel so that the environment, the skies, the air, our lungs all get a break.

Parts of China are seeing blue sky and clouds for the first time in forever with the factories being shut down.

Working from home rather than commuting to work (less pollution, more personal time).

Reconnecting with family as there is more time at home.

An invitation to turn inwards — a deep meditation – rather than the usual extroverted going out to self-soothe.

To reconnect with self – what is really important to me?

A reset economically.
The working poor. The lack of healthcare access for over 30 million in the US. The need for paid sick leave.

How hard does one need to work to be able to live, to have a life outside of work?

And, washing our hands – how did that become a ‘new’ thing that we need to remember. But, yes, we did.

The presence of grace for all.
There is a shift underway in our society – what if it is one that is favourable for us?

What if this virus is an ally in our evolution?
In our remembrance of what it means to be connected, humane, living a simpler life, to be less impactful/more kind to our environment.
An offering from my heart this morning. Offered as another perspective. Another way of relating to this virus, this unfolding, this evolution.
It was time for a change, we all know that.

And, change has arrived.
What if …

Beaming love light out to you all. Be the brightest you can be. Shine your light.

And so it goes...

‘In every heart, there is a home, a sanctuary safe and strong.’

Only those of you that know me best will know how much I am a fan of Billy Joel. Ha, so that’s a line I never anticipated writing in a blog about healing and wellbeing! But it should never have been a surprise really, the power of music to speak to our heart is well documented and indeed experienced. This lyric line above resonates really strongly with me. Those of you who have been for a session more recently, or came to my talk in John Lewis last month, will recognise the power of the journey into being in our own hearts – home indeed to our very essence, our soul.

The call to be in our truth, to be the most authentic version of us, is huge right now – more so than I have ever experienced in my life. I’m a little over 50, so it could easily be interpreted as an age thing – getting on and not putting up with the same stuff or, as I like to refer to it, going up another ‘f*** it’ level in the game of life!

But it is so much more than that. I see it all around me, with people struggling to hold their place in life as it has been. Hold down jobs that expect them not to be the best of themselves. I see it in the news, hidden truth emerging on a daily basis. People in crisis – physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. Breakdowns, which I much prefer to call breakthroughs. Breakthroughs from a version of ourselves we have constructed, shielding ourselves from harm by barricading ourselves in layers of protection. Hard, over layers. ‘Man up, just get on with it, get over it, suck it up sister, dose up and get back to work, drink up and forget about it, stop being so sensitive, you’ll never be a success doing that!’ Any wonder we hide our hearts away and create a persona that is tough enough to cope with life and all its harshness? Some of us use humour to deflect. Some become tough, hard-arsed, brittle. Some just keep their heads down and never venture back into territory that they were scared away from – be it relationships, work, creativity.

And so it goes … except now, it can’t go like that anymore. It’s time up.

Time up for the projections that people have put on you, sending their own inadequacies your way.

Time up for the thing that you were turned away from, by someone’s criticism.

Time up for rejecting fully engaging in life, in all aspects, even the bits that scare you.

Time up for hiding your truth from the world.

Time up for not listening to and singing your heart song.

It’s time. The world needs you. It needs you to be the best and most authentic version of you.

If you are done with the old, if life just isn’t working for you anymore and you are ready to do a deep dive to find you – the really bloody beautiful you, the magnificent you, the truly talented you – come with me. We’ll take the first step together and then work out the rest from there.

Who am I?

Back before the turn of the new millennium, I was working at the Science Museum. Yes, that one. The big one in London, that you might have visited as a child.

Having joined in 1996, most of us there at that time were working hard on delivering the Museum’s millennium project, the Wellcome Wing. One of the galleries that my colleague and friend was leading on was called Who Am I? A terrific gallery that focused on the astonishing human body and genetics, possibly still there, though I feel it will have been updated or replaced by now.

I thought even then that it posed a good question.

Spin forward a decade or more and I found myself working for an Equality and Diversity practitioner, going around public institutions and teaching their teams how to be more open and inclusive. One of the questions we posed then was ‘who am I?’.

Not surprisingly we heard people’s names, their relationship to others, even their job titles. But none of those things actually define who we are, just who we are in relation to others, or indeed what we do.

So it remains a good question.

When becoming the people we are today, we face a huge number of influences. Family, friends, peers, school, geographic, social and economic differences and media to name a few key ones.

Then as we get older, colleagues, partners, bosses, and a wider social group. Each one of these has the potential to have huge impact on who you become.

Ever heard yourself or someone you know say they are ‘no good at maths’, ‘can’t sing’, ‘can’t draw’, ‘rubbish at writing’? Or even that that ‘nothing good ever happens to me’?

Delve just a little below the surface, and you will very often find that this was a message they picked up from someone else, one of the influencers, as they grew up and developed a sense of self.

Words are powerful, but so is behaviour, in teaching us something that someone else believes about us. I battled on in a less than healthy marriage and in jobs that were an unpleasant or even toxic environment to be in, because in my head I said to myself ‘I am not a quitter’. That was until it dawned on me, that the voice I heard was an early influencer telling me I never stuck at anything. I was trying to prove to myself, and I guess to them that I was not ‘a quitter’.

Does any of this resonate with you? Want to challenge these thoughts about yourself? Are you ready for change?

I am delighted to have been asked by John Lewis to do a talk at their Kingston store this month. If you are curious, challenged or simply interested to know more, you can find out details here.

Do come and join me at this free lunchtime talk and decide to begin the journey back to self. I cannot tell you how joyful and liberating it can be. I look forward to sharing some practical tips and some insights with you.

Be your own best friend!

‘Meditation practice isn’t about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better, it’s about befriending who we are. ‘Pema Chodron

Life is tough, we all go through challenging times and when we are in the midst of these, what I call ‘the eye of the storm’, it can be almost impossible to see a way out.

That’s often where we go wrong. The way out is never outside of us, it is always within. Huh? It feels like life is falling apart around us, there is drama and chaos. With every step forward you might be able to make, there’s always a corresponding step back. At least one. Bloody laws of physics! I seriously failed my physics O level exams. I should have realised even back then.

But over time I have come to have a better appreciation for Newton. If we work out how to adjust something within us, then correspondingly something outside of us will also change. And so to work. If life does feel uninspiring, fraught or like you are caught up in chaos and drama, fighting to keep you head above water, throw yourself a lifeline.

Start by acknowledging that you are in need of some self help, or want things to feel better. And more importantly, that you can effect change. You are more powerful than you imagine.

Take time for you. Make it a promise to yourself. That you will do one thing that will help you feel better about what is going on. That you deserve to feel better, calmer, more peaceful, contented than you do now.

As Pema Chodron says meditation is about befriending ourselves. Come and join in our small group meditations on Wednesdays at 7:30. Sessions on 18th and 25th of this month. Spaces are limited so please do book ahead, but pay on the day. No previous meditation experience required, just turn up and make friends with yourself!

All events listed here http://www.helsnicholas.co.uk/public-events

Book here http://www.helsnicholas.co.uk/get-in-touch

Look to the leaders of love

I was just a few months old when, in April 1968, Martin Luther King Jnr was killed.

Growing up in a relatively small town in South Wales, a significantly white, working class environment, I had no exposure to him or his work until my teens. I remember going home from school and, I suppose in thrall to his ethos and work, was talking about it while laying the table for tea (that’s what we called dinner or supper). My mum, clearly having a tricky day, just couldn’t take it all in while fixing food for our family of five, and told me to stop. I remember it very vividly.

I guess I shut it out of my consciousness then but, every now and again, I find myself drawn back. Now is such a time.

One of his more famous quotes has been reverberating around my consciousness in recent months which, in the past day or so, has reached such a crescendo that I feel the need to write about it.

‘Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.’

Each of us will have our own interpretation about exactly what he meant, but for me it is a clear instruction. If you want to overcome the energy of hate, anger or fear – I think of these as shadow energies/darkness – then the only way to do that is to work with love. For me, this is light.

There is a lot of fear, anger and confusion surging around at the moment. It is within each of us and therefore perpetuating around us. If we are to tackle the presence of hatred and fear, then we must first look to ourselves. It has to begin with us. And we must operate all the more with love.

Firstly, we must treat ourselves with loving care and respect.

If you are unable to do so, look to the reasons why and work out a plan or a route to overcome that. Keep searching for the right way for you and don’t stop until you find that you can. With your intention, with determination, you will do it. I don’t write this as if I have totally mastered it myself, but as someone who has been on a long journey towards self-acceptance – we are all work in progress.

As we work on raising our own light levels, we automatically have an impact on what is around us. Esoteric philosopher Hermes Trismegistus said, ‘As above, so below; as within, so without’. What we impact within us, we impact outside of and around us.

In the past I have felt myself powerless at the bottom of a hole surrounded by numerous challenges. I know now that as soon as I started seeking a way out and feeling a bit lighter in myself, then those other troubles quickly began to drop away. Perhaps you have experienced something like this too?

And so to another great teacher of love and of the power of love for change, Mahatma Gandhi. In almost the same vein as King, he said, ‘hatred can be overcome only by love.’

If you are feeling angry or fearful right now, I can see and understand that – we are in interesting and challenging times.

My invitation to you is to join me in considering the wisdom of these and more contemporary teachers, such as Marianne Williamson.

Where you can, speak with care and with love. Where you can, behave with care and with love. If you feel the need to act, then do so, but not in fear, anger and hatred of those who aren’t working for the greater good but with enough love to overcome the shadow that they are casting.

Be the leader of your own crusade for love. Impact with love on those immediately around you, and those beyond who you can also reach. But always begin with you. You are key. Each one of us is.

Be love. Shine your light.

You are magnificent.

Best laid plans...

Crikey, what a week! Just when we though we couldn’t deal with much more intensity, the week delivered in spades.

Last Wednesday I was meant to hold the 3rd meditation session for this month. I woke up and found that we had a power cut, first thing in the morning. Not particularly worried about this, I established that it had been reported and that some of our neighbours were also affected. It was sorted relatively quickly and having kept the fridge and freezer closed, it had no impact being off for an hour in the morning.

I don’t know about you, but I was struggling to sleep in that heat last week. I mean, I’m Welsh, just in case I hadn’t already mentioned that. Simply not built for those sorts of temperatures! So feeling a bit sluggish I got on with the business of the day, some client correspondence, some sorting and clearing at home and then out for some shopping. I should have realised it wasn’t going to be quite as straightforward when I got a static shock off the car parking ticket machine. Ouch, that was quite a build up.

I pick up a message at lunchtime from a dear and trusted friend who was finding that life was putting her through the burn, and needed to get away. We made a plan and she packed her bags and was on her way to me, a good few hours drive but with the intention she would arrive in time for the meditation session at 7:30.

I felt like I was winning when I found a pedestal fan at the reasonable price and pleased with myself, brought it and all the other bits of shopping home. to a power cut. Again. Hardly surprising, we were all in meltdown, so why would the electricity not feel that impact. A bit of running around trying to get it reported, checking in with neighbours, it looked like we had been switched off to effect a proper repair to the one that hadn’t held that morning.

That fan wasn’t going to be much use then. And the food shopping, oh bugger! I decided it was sensible to postpone the class, too many contingencies required. Luckily it did get sorted later that night, not before I managed a meditation for my frazzled chum and I. And it worked, bringing us both into a much cooler, calmer, quieter state. Helping us remember that we are much more than the frustrated and often distracted people in busy and sometimes challenging lives.

I find regular meditation essential now, helping me navigate the ups and downs, helping me through the turmoil and the challenges, because this is life, it happens to us all. Grounding, which I have spoken about previously, is a bit like the earth connection in electrical terms, it stops the shock closing you down and gives the energy somewhere to flow into to make you safe.

Tomorrow will be the last session for this month, and there are still a few places available. If you too have found that you need to switch off the power, get away from the static and simply be the being you are, come and join us. 7:30pm, just £10, time out, reset. Let me know if this speaks to you, it would be lovely to have you here.

I have put some dates in the diary for Wednesdays starting in September, and intend to do 4-week blocks again with a bit of space in between. First round will be 4th, 11th, 18th and 25th September. Do let me know if you want to book in for any of these.

Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow, but if not, give yourself space and more importantly permission to have your own version of time-out, just for you. All power to you, shine on.

Don't just hope for the best...stay connected.

I meant to write this last week, after the second of my meditation classes. In basking in the reflective glory of the 50th anniversary of the moon landing, I guided a meditation where we simply allowed ourselves to float out into the cosmos. We could see ourselves as part of the cosmos, amongst the planets and stars. It’s an astonishing thing to be able to let go of your physical presence so much and allow yourself to be part of it all.

We have just cleared a very intense energy period, where the full moon and partial eclipse closed a 2-week window where we may well have found that sleep was very light and/or disturbed. The intensity of that energy was released, simply by allowing the call of the planets to draw us out to them.

Before any meditation or indeed any spiritual practice, I ALWAYS begin with a grounding exercise. Here we imagine we have roots, in the same way as an ancient oak tree has, deep and wide in the earth, keeping us anchored through the storms of life. Many of you will recognise the sense and language of it, I use it with clients regularly to help them become more present.

After enjoying the sense of connection to all that is, out in the light-filled cosmos, I guided us back in, reconnecting us to our roots, that ensured we could come back and be fully present. What a journey, it was beautiful.

Last week I also attended a regular group where we work channeling sound and sending it out as healing energy. It’s essential practice to ground properly before leaving to travel home and this time I failed to do so. What followed was a very real bringing me down to earth moment of falling on top of someone as the tube moved off. I was not only embarrassed, as he had kindly just given me his seat, but sore having jarred my joints and feeling bruised for the rest of the week.

Today, I see 2 dear friends with feet up, in plaster or badly bruised. My sense is the intensity of energy of the last few weeks has us all feeling a bit ungrounded, myself included! I think this week’s meditation might have us anchoring on earth, maybe in a wood! If you have been struggling with the energy, if you are finding it difficult to sleep, or even to be present (feeling distracted or not really with it), come and join us for a meditation that will calm anxieties and thoughts, and then bring you back to a feeling of greater stillness, peace and connection. Don’t just hope it’ll all feel better, come and make it so.

Meditation classes this month. Wednesday July 24th and 31st, 7:30pm - £10, payable in person on the day.

I am going to record a grounding exercise that is simple to follow, needs no previous experience to use. I’ll let you know when it’s available to buy as an MP3 file. Used every day it can quickly make a real difference to how you feel and how you feel more able to deal with life. Get your roots into earth and make like an oak tree!

And breathe........and then after, sleep.

Last night was the first of 4 meditation classes I am running on consecutive Wednesdays this month. It was a new gathering, a small group with a mix of more experienced and complete beginners at meditation. Each brought their willingness and openness to the session and it was a wonderful, gentle, deeply calming experience.

I’ve recently come back from a 5-day retreat, with a group of mature women, all healers in their own way. It was such an amazing retreat, such a powerful and obvious sense of connection to each other. The energy between us was compassionate, gentle, respectful, loving and supportive. It was a deeply moving experience just to be in the presence of and share in this energy.

The power of meditation in a group is amazing, and last night was proof indeed that you do not need to have any prior experience to really benefit from it. An unusually good night’s sleep was one of the direct benefits noted. Well, we all need some of that don’t we..!

If you have been wondering if you can meditate, if you are in need of feeling more relaxed or calm, or just want your monkey chattering brain to shut up for a bit, but don’t know how….come and join us for a meditation session. What have you got to lose?

Thanks again to last night’s participants for sharing such lovely energy. I hope you have held some sense of that today. And heartfelt thanks from me for giving me such a joyful teaching experience. I am really grateful to you all.

If you are interested in any of the session on 17th, 24th or 31st July at 7:30, get in touch here which will make sure I don’t miss anyone's response.

Peace. x

Still needing peace and stillness?

Still searching for that elusive peace, space, stillness? Take some invaluable time for yourself.

You will have seen that I am starting to offer meditation classes. These will be suitable for all, whatever your knowledge or previous experience, and will feature guided meditations and journeys.

I'm running sessions this month, starting on Wednesday 10th. There are still a few places available. Don't worry if you can't make this week as there are also sessions on 17, 24 and 31 July, 7.30–9pm, just £10 per session. These are stand alone sessions, attend one or all if you are available.

So if you are interested and want to book, please get in touch here which will make sure I don’t miss anyone's response.

If you've not been to see me for a while and feel called to, do please get in touch – either by responding to this using the button below, or through the contact page here.

Do remember that although I offer all sessions from my home in Epsom, I can also offer intuitive guidance or mediumship sessions via Skype.

Beaming loving light your way, as always.

World Wellbeing Week

Today marks the beginning of World Wellbeing Week, 24th - 28th June 2019

A more holistic encapsulation of wellbeing than the recent Mental Health week, the focus is on all aspects of wellbeing. There are many great conversations and initiatives which have appeared in the news recently including Government action and proposals on wellbeing as a direct budget focus in both New Zealand and the UK.

Child poverty, domestic violence and mental health will be the priorities in New Zealand’s “wellbeing budget”, with the nation declaring itself the first in the world to measure success by its people’s wellbeing.

Personal wellbeing rather than economic growth should be the primary aim of government spending, a new report recommended recently in the UK.

It found happiness, fulfilment and the reduction of anxiety, rather than growth or jobs, was the main determinant of whether governments satisfied voters, and called on ministers to implement changes to focus on such metrics.

And there are fantastic efforts by so many charities and community organisations to bring wellbeing to the fore.

As there is welcome attention on whole wellbeing on a global level, it’s a good time for each of us to consider what changes we can make that will impact our own and others wellbeing.

I’ll be reflecting some of my own thoughts and others insights throughout the week. I look forward to sharing with you.

As above so below | As within so without | As the soul so the universe.

Make time for meditation – new classes from my new home

My new home in Epsom has enabled me to expand my work and I am delighted that I am now able to offer meditation classes.

These will be guided meditations and are suitable for all – whatever your knowledge or previous experience. To begin, I'm running sessions over four Wednesday evenings next month – 10, 17, 24 and 31 July, 7.30–9pm, £10 per session. As they will be stand-alone sessions, you do not need to be able to attend all of them, and can join us whenever you are able.

Places will be limited, so if you are interested and want to book, please get in touch here which will make sure I don’t miss anyone's response.

I know from my own experiences that it can be a challenge to start meditating. A group setting and guidance can be a great way to begin. If you have any questions, please get in touch.

Peace and stillness

Thank you for today. I feel like I have peace inside me, a kind of stillness, which I’ve not felt before. Well, not naturally! I’ll see you soon to clear the rest of the stuff that’s not mine to hold anymore.

MS

Come along to see me work in public

I consider mediumship a form of healing through words, but I am not like a spiritual telephone exchange, guaranteeing a connection with someone you want to speak to or hear from. There can be no guarantee that clairsentience and mediumship will give you what you are looking for.

I practice one-to-one mediumship privately, but I also deliver messages from the platform in Spiritualist churches across London and the South.  If you are interested in seeing me work, you would be more than welcome to come along to any of the following services.  There is no need to book, but most churches ask for a small goodwill donation.

Public Events Calendar